October 27, 2008

My thoughts on the Republic of Korea have been rather mixed. I am not sure if I can say that I truly like this country. I know that as native speakers, it would only be natural to communicate with your fellow country men in your mother tongue, but I wonder if it is common to sometimes exclude the foreigner.

The relief has set in that I will not be a solitary teacher, my duties is to aid a primary teacher. So far, most of the information that I have received has been inaccurate. I was original told that I would be stationed at one school, not far from my residence. Instead, I will be at four schools; two located in the country side and two within the city. The good news is that three of the schools have other faculty members which will pick me up and the fourth I will have to take a taxi to.

I get along with most of the other educators, yet one seems not to like me very much. I am unsure if he is joking around with me or whether he is trying to cut me down. I understand that I do not speak very loudly, especially when placed in new situations, but right now I am frustrated with trying to overcome this preconceived opinion of me. Not all is bad, the other three teachers have made great efforts to speak to me and two have extended a hand of friendship.

I know my grasp of the English language has been faulty at times, but I truly question whether or not I will make it through this experience. One thing that has been made clear is that I look very Korean, to the point of when I am being shown around, the other teachers ask where the foreign teacher is. So that brings up the question of whether the disapproval comes from the fact that I am too similar and there is no need for the formalities or that they do not need to acknowledge me as an American. Already, at a disadvantage, there is so much ground to make up.

There are a few idiosyncrasies that I am not sure if it is the individual or the society. There is one female co-teacher in which I am assigned to, her timid behavior only baffles me more. For instance, while at dinner I notice the male associates have no reservation at picking and choosing which of the small dishes they wanted to pick from, but when it came to her she did not take any of the higher quality dishes and stuck mainly to the basic starchy dishes. Is there still a separation of the genders? Females have come quite far in Asia, but are they still looked upon as in a lower light?

I wonder if I am trying to analyze this culture more to figure out my place in it or if I am just finding faults in which to scrutinize it. I have been in this city for two full days and within that time I have not been able to go to the grocer or even a bank. I had no Korean won in my possession to venture out and try to procure any goods if I wanted to. Yet I have had two people offer to lend me money and one who just took some out and hand it to me. I am completely unease by these expressions of kindness and wonder if these gestures come from good will. I just want to become more acquainted with everyone; this new setting has made me more self conscious of how I am perceived. I no longer have the “not everyone will like you” point of view I use to and that is more corrosive than anything else.